Hats off to the lucky few, but the rest of us have a problem that we need to solve urgently. The last part of the speech I gave last month on "Entrepreneurship in the IT sector", is actually the beginning of everything: Our topic today is happiness.
Let's start by correcting a common misconception: A happy life is not a life where pain is avoided, and a happy person is not one who leads a happy life 24/7. In fact, how much you take (and even own) the pain and how you react to it, in the end determines your level of happiness.
There is a little good in all evil
When someone close to you dies, does it make you more afraid of death; or does it remind you that your time is limited and push you to use it more efficiently? When someone insults you for no reason, do you get angry and seek revenge; or do you see this as an opportunity to practice the art of patience and tolerance, and keep on the right side of him?
Beyond the choices in daily life, 'happiness' is hidden in the sublayers of human being, who is in fact a highly complex creature.
There are 4 main colors that make us human. When these come together, they bring out the light within us, just as true colors combine to form white:
Some sources also add a 5th 'relational' layer, but we'll cover it with 2nd and 3rd.
- How well you take care of your body obviously determines your physical health. Your diet, your habits such as sports, smoking or alcohol, your sleeping pattern... It is not only a dream to be happy just with a perfect body, but also to achieve lasting happiness with a sluggish one.
- Are you a curious person? It may sound like a simple question, but the answer is vital. If you are not, look for topics that will interest you, make you do research for hours, take you to experts and ask them questions. Get new hobbies. Read books. Exchange ideas with your friends.
- Quality time spent with the people (and animals) you care is the number one factor in not only how happy you are but also how long you will live. Another one is gratitude: Make it a habit to appreciate positive events and behaviors.
- The most difficult layer to feed. Do you have a purpose that gets you out of bed every morning, that allows you to face any obstacle? Do you do regular meditation or breathing exercises?
Our responses to trauma –whether pain strengthens us rather than weakens us, i.e. whether our vulnerability turns into our strength– depend on the extent to which we satisfy ourselves in these four categories.